Post 3/15/17 Update
There's a couple things I want to discuss before too much time passes... I guess first is that I've been trying to make small changes in my life that will have a significant impact as time goes on. For example, I'm fairly certain that once my e-reader arrives, I will get into the habit of reading before going to bed instead of falling asleep to Netflix. I've also been consistently working out since January. A lot of times I'll also get a salad for lunch because I know my vegetable intake has drastically decreased since moving out. I try avoid the unhealthy food they put in our break room as well, because what good are donuts, cookies, and bagels? It also didn't matter as much before, when my diet was mostly healthy, but now I make it a point to order food without certain things like bacon and mayo.
It also wasn't until recently that I've really begun to appreciate the extracurriculars my parents put me through as a kid, namely, piano and swimming. I'd say I had a pretty good balance between sports and arts, whereas it seemed like the Asian kids around me just had piano and/or violin. All the things I did: learn how to ride a bike, chess, karate, ballet, this workout club in my senior year of HS, clarinet, track, swim, and piano. Even "night math" for a couple months in grade 9 and drawing lessons for a bit at some point. I'm just bitter they didn't let me go to free weekend Korean language class. The point isn't that I was really good at any of it, just mediocre to average, but that I got the exposure, which showed me how to appreciate more aspects of life and ultimately opened more doors. All these activities added permanent value to my life, like going to college. I also think that because of the musical influence I got, my interest in singing and acting at a young age, and a certain English teacher in HS, I have the capacity to appreciate language, the arts, and social sciences. That is why it irks me when people (usually STEM) dismiss art. Of course, my parents harped on studying math, but they did it so much that it made me really hate it for a while. On the topic of appreciating my parents, all the things they did for me in the background before has surfaced as I've been living alone for 5 months now and have to do everything myself (read: cleaning the bathroom/toilet, taking out the trash, getting the mail, buying groceries, carrying the groceries up, cooking, dishes, car maint, bugs, general cleaning, the list goes on).
Anyway, onto the topic of work. I can't say I'm entirely happy with where I am and I think it has to do with the people. The work itself is new and interesting but I still lack motivation. It could be that I feel I can't truly be myself. I do have two pieces of advice I took from the accounting sub: (1) keep a list of everything you do and (2) network internally. Actually, I came up with that second point. I just keep a simple Excel file with columns for date, task name, and description. When it comes to interviews, resumes, and performance reviews, it will be handy. It is a lot more detailed than recalling your memory and makes giving specific examples during interviews easy. For the second point, I think that matters more at bigger firms because you don't get the chance to work directly with managers and above. They effectively don't know you exist. The truth is, you can get ahead being mediocre at your work but having the right people know you and think well of you. It's not enough being good at your work because no one will look out for you and give you credit. Are you going to wait for that senior to maybe say a good word about you to some manager? Ha.
Moving on again, a little while ago I got to be on the other side of recruiting. I was at a "target school" with some others trying to "attract talent". It wasn't a particularly mind blowing experience or anything really, in fact, I felt little different than those wide-eyed students, just more apathetic and jaded. I guess the only thing I don't comprehend is why those who start out in tax or audit move into HR after a while. I find it difficult to respect those people and I think HR/recruiting personnel are a waste of space. For all my bitchiness, what I like to say is, give me a few years and I'll come around. I'm working on the various negative perceptions (prejudices?) I have.
The last topic for the night is what I want in the future. A certain convo with a coworker reminded me of how different we were. Most people are self-absorbed, myself included, and perhaps this is the result of an age difference as he is 15 years older, but I like to think that I care about the world. I want to somehow better the world through tax law, volunteer, and write a book someday. I'm also okay if I never do any of that because maybe just striving for that is enough. As long as your intentions are kind and unselfish, you will have some kind of positive impact on someone.
So I leave you with this quote from the anime, Attack on Titan, "You have to give up something if you want to change." I think it could not be more true and simply put. For all the hours I spent watching it, this quote made it worth it.
It also wasn't until recently that I've really begun to appreciate the extracurriculars my parents put me through as a kid, namely, piano and swimming. I'd say I had a pretty good balance between sports and arts, whereas it seemed like the Asian kids around me just had piano and/or violin. All the things I did: learn how to ride a bike, chess, karate, ballet, this workout club in my senior year of HS, clarinet, track, swim, and piano. Even "night math" for a couple months in grade 9 and drawing lessons for a bit at some point. I'm just bitter they didn't let me go to free weekend Korean language class. The point isn't that I was really good at any of it, just mediocre to average, but that I got the exposure, which showed me how to appreciate more aspects of life and ultimately opened more doors. All these activities added permanent value to my life, like going to college. I also think that because of the musical influence I got, my interest in singing and acting at a young age, and a certain English teacher in HS, I have the capacity to appreciate language, the arts, and social sciences. That is why it irks me when people (usually STEM) dismiss art. Of course, my parents harped on studying math, but they did it so much that it made me really hate it for a while. On the topic of appreciating my parents, all the things they did for me in the background before has surfaced as I've been living alone for 5 months now and have to do everything myself (read: cleaning the bathroom/toilet, taking out the trash, getting the mail, buying groceries, carrying the groceries up, cooking, dishes, car maint, bugs, general cleaning, the list goes on).
Anyway, onto the topic of work. I can't say I'm entirely happy with where I am and I think it has to do with the people. The work itself is new and interesting but I still lack motivation. It could be that I feel I can't truly be myself. I do have two pieces of advice I took from the accounting sub: (1) keep a list of everything you do and (2) network internally. Actually, I came up with that second point. I just keep a simple Excel file with columns for date, task name, and description. When it comes to interviews, resumes, and performance reviews, it will be handy. It is a lot more detailed than recalling your memory and makes giving specific examples during interviews easy. For the second point, I think that matters more at bigger firms because you don't get the chance to work directly with managers and above. They effectively don't know you exist. The truth is, you can get ahead being mediocre at your work but having the right people know you and think well of you. It's not enough being good at your work because no one will look out for you and give you credit. Are you going to wait for that senior to maybe say a good word about you to some manager? Ha.
Moving on again, a little while ago I got to be on the other side of recruiting. I was at a "target school" with some others trying to "attract talent". It wasn't a particularly mind blowing experience or anything really, in fact, I felt little different than those wide-eyed students, just more apathetic and jaded. I guess the only thing I don't comprehend is why those who start out in tax or audit move into HR after a while. I find it difficult to respect those people and I think HR/recruiting personnel are a waste of space. For all my bitchiness, what I like to say is, give me a few years and I'll come around. I'm working on the various negative perceptions (prejudices?) I have.
The last topic for the night is what I want in the future. A certain convo with a coworker reminded me of how different we were. Most people are self-absorbed, myself included, and perhaps this is the result of an age difference as he is 15 years older, but I like to think that I care about the world. I want to somehow better the world through tax law, volunteer, and write a book someday. I'm also okay if I never do any of that because maybe just striving for that is enough. As long as your intentions are kind and unselfish, you will have some kind of positive impact on someone.
So I leave you with this quote from the anime, Attack on Titan, "You have to give up something if you want to change." I think it could not be more true and simply put. For all the hours I spent watching it, this quote made it worth it.
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