MS in Taxation

Well, where do I start? I’ll start with this recruiting season: it went well. I received a full-time offer in tax with a big firm starting after I graduate next year, think top ten. Am I happy? Oh yes. It is absolutely what I wanted. Location-wise, I can deal with it. The important thing is that I’ll be working in public, not industry, which is where I want to stay as far as I can tell (even if it kills me). This is so insanely important to me because while some people do transition from industry to public, I’ve already experienced public so it wouldn’t make sense to take an industry role for a year or two and then go back. I mean, it could, I would say I wasn’t being challenged enough, but that is an obvious huge detour and I’m already too old to afford any more detours. I know what you’re thinking, 23, old? Get out. Though if you knew the things I wanted to accomplish, then actually, I am behind schedule.

So not only am I continuing in public, in tax no less, I will be starting my career off with the right size firm. Anything smaller than top ten and I would’ve had to make the additional step of transferring to a bigger firm later. Maybe that makes me sound like a pompous ass but there is a world of difference between local, regional, national, and B4 firms that can’t be ignored. I’m not talking about the name recognition, prestige, or perks. At a minimum, clients will be vastly different and this affects your ability to specialize technically, the complexity of work, and the accessibility to any industry you want to explore. Also, the network of people you will be exposed to at a B4 or national firm is impressive, tons of quality peers, managers, and partners in addition to the upper management of big name companies. And what is the business world without its connections? I get that “connections” and “networking” have a negative connotation to them, but that’s a discussion for another day. The way I see it is, the world is run by people, so what is more imperative than knowing how to interact with people? Whether you use that ability to make ethical decisions is another issue entirely, but in itself, being able to build effective connections is an admirable quality. You can be as technical as you want by yourself, but if at the end of the day you are alone in your pursuit, it leads nowhere. People are the foundation upon which everything is built.

So the two points above about clients and people are really getting at one thing: growth. I think the concept of growth should apply to every aspect of a person’s life because the moment we stop improving, stop going forward, we are unknowingly treading backwards. As much as you might wish for it, there is no standstill in time.

Moving on, the biggest takeaway from my NYC journey was learning how to be myself, that is, being comfortable in my own skin. I think that plays an important role in being confident and I felt it, I could see it in the way others reacted. I noticed when I started attending campus recruiting events this semester. Suddenly, conversations were more exciting, I was more enthusiastic, and I felt as if I had opened up, no longer afraid to express myself. It is still a work in progress though, like everything else.

Back to my “too old” comment though, it’s true, I am not feeling that well these days. I suppose if I am to choose a demanding career and lifestyle that I am to be more careful with my sleep habits, diet, and exercise. Health concerns have creeped upon me like a bitch. It’s the classic you don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone. I suspect that cliché applies to many things in life so that is why self-reflection is important, taking the time to step back from the rush before it all escapes you.

Between the work, travel, school, and securing a career path, I haven’t had time to invest in a relationship. I recently almost went on a date (dude was a fluke) that made me truly realize I’m not interested in anything romantic or physical right now. I don’t understand why so many people feel the need to be in a relationship, to have that significant other. All the almost-date reminded me of was how much time is lost in wondering what the other person “really means”, making plans, and updating the other person on meaningless daily details. Not even that, just having to timely update someone out of obligation. I mean, I’ll probably tell my close friends stuff that’s happening on a daily basis, but there isn’t that pressure you don’t even realize. Text conversations, I hate those. Texting should be limited to making plans and meeting up. A quick “you free to grab lunch?” or “I’m outside now” or “did you take out the trash?” Basically I was reminded of all the time spent on someone else and for what in the end? I guess I’ve yet to meet someone I find worth the time a relationship takes up.

I think some people need to be in a relationship or at least need the physical aspect of it because the physical is something they can’t do without. Honestly, I think those types of people are too controlled by their id. I find that a turnoff and sort of lack respect for them. I’m not some cuddle-hater, but its importance ranks so low on my priorities. There are so many more interesting things (hopefully) to a person and that’s what you care about? Whether or not you two can cuddle on a couch with a tub of ice cream watching Game of Thrones? Maybe I just don’t understand intimacy anymore, whether that’s physical or emotional. Maybe I am closed off. I am definitely still hurting from what ended over a year ago. Lost was not just the short-lived romantic relationship, but the entire duration of our friendship and a future. Perhaps the saddest part is to know I will be the only one to remember all our shared memories and no one else in the world will ever know. He will forget, so I’ll remain the sole bearer of those times. Why should those times matter so much to me I sometimes wonder? Perhaps the saddest part is to know that he is moving on, changing, and all that remains with me is a memory of who he once was. How accurate now are those lyrics that spout “I don’t even know you anymore”.

I am fairly certain that a part of me is using this as a crutch to prevent myself from moving on. It makes little sense, but maybe there is a fear of the unknown, a fear of falling again.

I am however happy, so unless the right person comes along, I am content in going solo through it all.

With that, I want to wish a happy Thanksgiving. This is a big deal because I care little about most holidays, but being grateful is something we should never forget.

desda